3 Tips To Help You Have A Healthy Open Adoption

Posted on: 21 September 2015

Finding out about a pregnancy can be stressful for parents who don't feel they are ready to raise a child. For some, adoption is the best way to give a child the chance to succeed in life. If you are thinking of placing your baby for adoption (through an organization such as http://www.achildsdream.org), you might be considering an open adoption. These types of adoptions allow you to maintain contact with your child. They can also be easier for some birth parents to cope with.  

Here are three tips that will help you have a healthy open adoption in the future. 

1. Be prepared to allow the relationship with your child to develop slowly over time.

Connecting with a child you have given up for adoption can be difficult, even if you have an open adoption arrangement. The child may not understand who you are or the role that you want to play in his or her life.

You can facilitate the building of a relationship with your child by practicing proven methods of connecting with him or her. Be sure that you are investing time in the relationship and that you are tenacious when it comes to your desire to stay connected, and eventually your child will grow to accept your presence in his or her life. 

2. Nurture a relationship with your child's adoptive parents.

Having a birth mother or father in a child's life can be difficult for adoptive parents. It's important that you recognize how difficult an open adoption may be for the adoptive parents, and work to nurture a relationship with them.

Assure your child's adoptive parents that you are not trying to take over any parenting duties, but that you merely want to play a supporting role in your child's life. Developing a genuine friendship with adoptive parents by respecting their fears and addressing their concerns will help your open adoption be a success.

3. Be prepared to invest in counseling.

Because there are strong emotions associated with the adoption of a child, it's important that you are willing to invest in counseling if you want your open adoption to be a success.

A counselor can work with both you and the adoptive parents to define roles, set boundaries, and process the stress that can accompany an open adoption. Make sure that you select an adoptive family that is also willing to attend counseling, and your open adoption will have a greater chance of being successful.

If you decide that an open adoption is the right choice for your child, be sure that you remain patient while developing a relationship with your child, nurture relationships with your child's adoptive parents, and invest in counseling to ensure the success of your open adoption. 

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